A day in the life of a mother

This blog is about a day in the life of a frum (orthodox Jewish) mother with small children.

Monday, May 26, 2008

My little parrot

#1 is so funny. He has taken to memorizing commercials. Over shabbos dinner, he asked me if I was having break outs. I am all confused, and am like, huh?? he says if you are, just use noxema. LOL. Today he came home with an invitation his friend gave him, dated march 30. it was for another boy's party that was over 2 months ago. I didnt' look at the date and rsvpd. the mother seemed confused. the mother then told me she wasn't having a party. then I realized it said MARCH 30th. and besides may 30th is a friday. whoops. I need some sleep, me thinks LOL.

well, it's expected I am so tired, after coming home from the e.r. last night at 11:30 pm. #1 and #3 were roughhousing on the bed at bedtime right as hubby was getting the books to tutor #1 in yiddishkeit and #2 went into their room to see and #3 accidently banged into #2's forehead with the back of his head, which then formed a little gash on her, right above her eyebrow. Being I don't have a car, I phoned my mother in law to ask for a lift to the e.r. . she told me she isn't' staying with me at the hospital only dropping me off, despite the fact that my brother in law is being watched by someone and my father in law would be home any minute from shul and take over from the sitter. I have no family here, and my husband needed to stay with the kids. I had asked my mother in law what about if my father in law watches the kids while she can give me and hubby a lift to the hospital with #2 and then she can go home to the sitter. she didn't want to. I am a very nervous type of person and am a bit phobic of ontario hospitals after hearing so many terrible things about its health care and having several negative personal experiences myself. I asked my neighbor to come with me, as we are friends, and she said okay. then my mother in law asks why I need her to come with me. Because I do not like being alone at the hospital and do not want an anxiety attack either. So my neighbor met me at the hospital and stayed with me the whole time and gave us a lift home. #2 needed glue and a steri strip as they were out of the liquid freezy stuff called lat(sp?) used to numb the area before stitches. B"H She is ok and today was very excited to tell every single person we saw at school today about her adventures. The doctor at the e.r. was very nice and looked a lot like david tennant from doctor who. not only that, instead of calling himself dr. so and so, he called himself the doctor, just like doctor who, and he did it several times. My neighbor and I were a bit in shock about how my mother in law never bothered to come back to the hospital. at least she did call though. Anyway I got a lift from my neighbor home so it doesn't make much of a difference. I want to get her something nice to show my appreciation for staying with me and #2 until 11:30 pm...

time to go..hubby is home now.

Friday, May 23, 2008

My moment in DitzyLand

I sign up for focus groups. I love going to these to share my opinion on a variety of topics, plus I get paid 50 dollars and sometimes more for my time! Yesterday I got a call from one of the marketing agencies that run these, and the guy says to me, the people coming are a very interesting bunch, the topic is spirits. So, I tell him no..I can't go to a focus group about that! It's inappropriate. and he asks me why, so I tell him I am an orthodox Jew, and I don't feel comfortable discussing ghosts. So he starts laughing. Apparently, spirits means alcohol! DOH! I am such a ditz LOL. So obviously I don't drink, so I was screened out of the focus group about that topic. hehehe :P

So anyway I have not posted in a week. Sorry about that. I just was feeling lazy :P. Not much else interesting happened. #2 went on a class trip to a farm yesterday, #1 went on a class trip today to an outdoor adventure place. I have a meeting next Friday to finally meet the Autism Team in person. #1's teacher is not so crazy about the team, he says they never return calls, etc. and that their ideas are always just ideas, nothing concrete he can put to use, nothing exact. I am not sure what I will get out of this meeting, but hopefully I will get #1's name on the waiting list for a psychoeducational assessment, as the last one, he was only 4 and not all the tests could be completed at that time. He seems to be having a great week this week, B"H. I am glad. Maybe the break from bussing was just what was needed.

#2 is turning 6 this Thursday, (my how time flies!) She is graduating Senior Kindergarten June 17th! She will be getting her very first siddur with her name in Hebrew engraved inside. Next year she will be in grade 1 and get to wear the "big girls" uniform. #4 had her interview with the pre-school director this past week and will be starting nursery IY"H in September. She is potty trained, but we are still working on the poo part. She holds it in because she is afraid of pooing in the toilet, alternatively, she gets a pull up and poops in it and then wipes her own tushy...sigh. I think some bribes are in order to get the poop in the right place. :) As for #3, we are not sure if he should repeat junior kindergarten or go into S.K. He knows his aleph bais, but he is one of the youngest in the class, and still quite playful. S.K. is a lot of work and they need to learn how to read Hebrew and get homework. the director said she will discuss with his teachers and let me know where he will be for September by the end of June. #1 will be in grade 3 in september, IY"H.

Anyway, this Sunday, I am planning on going to a street sale. I plan on being an early bird, IY"H. I asked hubby to feed the kids breakfast for me so I can see if I can snag some good deals. I want to get another little tykes cozy coupe car, and some other toys for the kids. I find a lot of the good stuff gets bought up early by people who do this thing all the time, the professional garage sale shoppers LOL. I am still a novice, plus I have no vehicle so it makes it doubly hard to get things home. Anyways..

Have a good Shabbos! :)

Thursday, May 15, 2008

me feels sick

I am not feeling well. So achy it feels like my bones are sore. It started off with a sore throat, which is gone now. I think #5 may have an ear infection. She has no fever but was cranky today and barely ate her supper. She does have a cold. I'll see how she is in the morning.

I think next week I will go back to having #1 bussed in the morning. I don't think me walking him or having my mother in law drive him made much of a difference, except on the first day. Every other day this week, his communication journal read he was loud and disruptive in the morning..today it said he refused to do work this morning. If he is going to behave that way regardless of taking the bus or walking, much easier to have him bussed. But the question is, WHY? Why is #1 behaving like this in the morning at school??? I am having a meeting on the 30th with the principal, #1's teacher, and the autism team. I want some answers. I want some solutions. I want #1 in a different school if need be. He never had these problems at the other school he was at last year. I'll see what the autism team recommends. it's no surprise that the co-ordinator did not return my call from last Friday requesting he come back to observe #1 and find a better school placement.

Anyway, I feel crappy so I want to go lie down and rest.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Walk This Way...

So, this week we I am walking #1 to school in the morning instead of him taking the bus, and the teacher noticed a huge improvement in his behaviour. So even though its a huge pain to walk 5 kids to his school every morning, it's worth it because it means he will have a better day. I am supposed to have a meeting with the autism team on the 30th. FINALLY. B"H.

In other news, my friend does not have breast cancer, B"H. It turned out it was just a cyst. Whew.

Not much else doing right now..just trying to keep up with laundry and cleaning. Got to run, time to get dinner together for #2.

Monday, May 12, 2008

It's the the little things that matter

Mother's day was not a happy day for me. I have been under a lot of stress with #1's troubles at school, and I found out my best friend since I was 8 years old, found a lump the size of a quarter in her breast and has to go for mammogram and to the surgeon for a consult. Her mom had breast cancer (thank G-d, she is fine now.) I am so stressed out. Hubby didn't do anything for mother's day, his family is not into cards, etc and his dad always says every day is mother's day. The family was getting ready to go to the bubbe's house so I could go to the mall with hubby alone, and #1 was in the front yard waiting for us. He came in with a bouquet of dandelions and said happy mother's day mom. It really touched my heart. it was so thoughtful of him. we put them in a cup of water. It really made my day, such a simple gesture really got me out of the dumps. My other kids also wished me mother's day of course, which was special too.

Zaidy took #1 to school today. I am not sure how it went. I got the impression my father in law didn't want to tell me #1 was upset this morning, his voice sounded funny when I asked. He means well, but lectures a lot and doesn't believe #1 has asperger's so I was slightly worried as #1 changed his mind and wanted me to walk him at the last moment. (zaidy was already there) So far, no phone calls from the school so maybe I am just being paranoid as usual. I am supposed to call the principal this afternoon to discuss #1's troubles at school on the bus.
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Anyway, I am going to go enter some online contests now..

Friday, May 09, 2008

Wish I were on vacation

Okay, mid-morning today I get ANOTHER phone call. #1 is having a bad morning. Yelling, etc. He was put outside the classroom with the aide for time out. I spoke to the principal AGAIN. I told her I do not think this is working well, that while I thought his teacher was great, he doesn't seem to know what to do with #1. I also told her our situation with the psychoeduational assessment thing. I made some calls this morning. One dr. wanted 2700 and would not give me any receipts even for the 500 dollar deposit until all the payments have cleared!! then the other wanted 2200 minimum. My insurance only covers 1500. I do not have an extra 500+ to spend. We are on a tight enough budget as it is without this added expense. So the principal said she would show the school psychologist #1's previous assessment and then try to get his name on a waiting list for a psychoeducational assessment through the school. He will be on a wait list, but she said its not like its urgent where he needs this ASAP, as he already has had one in the past. It's just that not all the tests could be done back then because he was too young at the time. A very aggravating morning.

Then this afternoon I got a positive phone call, finally, from the teacher saying #1 had a great afternoon, and did some great stuff playing word scramble, and talked calmly, etc.

next week we are having a little experiment, where #1 will walk to school with me and the rest of my gang, instead of taking the morning bus, as he is having many issues with kids on the bus, and he is coming to school all riled up and agitated, when he has left home quite calmly. So we'll see if me walking him will be better.

Anyway, that's it for now. Good shabbos.

School Daze..

So, an update. I spoke with #1's principal yesterday morning. She said its the school's job to meet #1's needs so he will be able to learn there, and that there was no reason to change schools. I am going to be meeting with her, #1's teacher, and the autism team so we can discuss what our plans are for #1 so he will have a better rest of this school year and a good start to next year's school year. I am going to get him another psychoeducational assessment, but unfortunately, the psychologist who tested him 3 years ago when #1 was at a private Jewish school can't test him now, as he works for the school district for our region, and its in his work agreement not to take kids who attend school in the district as clients. So he is referring me to his co-worker who works for another school district. But I don't have her # and will have to wait for her to call. (he said he would pass on my number to her) Otherwise if I don't hear back from her by Monday or Tuesday, I will make an appointment with the psychologist who works for the school #1 used to go to that was for special needs a few years ago. (we had pulled him out of that school because its for kids who are severely disabled, such as cerebral palsy, downs, severe autism, etc) and #1 was not really learning anything there as he is very high functioning, B"H)

Anyway, that's the update so far. I feel a lot better after speaking with the principal. now I just have to wait for the psychologist who works with #1's original psychologist to call. I hate waiting for calls :P

time to get dressed now...

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

IRPC?? Screw the IRPC!!

I am extremely upset as I type this. I am sorry I signed the IRPC decision (Internal review and placement committee)for #1's school placement for september. I DO NOT want him back there!!! This school is NOT meeting his needs at all. I spent 35 minutes today talking to #1's teacher. (he called me.) #1 is having trouble on the bus with screaming and refusing to wear his seat belt. He is coming to school agitated from the bus ride, and his teacher thinks maybe I should go back to walking him to school. Then there is the fact that there is a severe personality conflict between #1 and his morning aide. He overhead me talking to his teacher about getting him someone new for a morning aide, and went up to her this morning and told her she was fired. Then there was the fact the other aide in the class has been someone new every 3 days. (there are 2 aides in his class, one for him 1 for the general class) there is the fact that #1 is acting out in class with yelling about other people's noises, and being bossy, he tried to bite his aide when she tried to remove him from the class for being disruptive. My son is not generally like this! he is not like this to this extent at home, he is head strong, but not the way he is in school! Last year, he did NONE of this behaviour, at the other school. I am so sorry I let the school district move him back to his home school. He did fabulous at the previous school last year. This has been a horrible year for him at his current school. His teacher agrees, pretty much saying he is having great difficulty teaching #1, and why did I take him out of the other school (it was NOT my choosing), but he says, you signed the IRPC and its going to be difficult now to change his placement for september. He felt he was not the right teacher for #1, it's obvious #1 is not getting his needs met there. It just so happens #1's karate teacher has a wife who is special ed teacher in the district, and has kids like #1 in her class (high functioning asperger's, ADHD, learning disabled). I spoke to her via him on Sunday. Today I called and told him, I know this is not proper procedure, but I explained #1's troubles and asked if his wife would be willing to take #1 on as a student, or give me advice on how to get him out of this school into another in the district with a better suited program for him. He is going to speak to her and call me tonight with some advice. I also made an appointment with the psychologist who tested #1 3 years ago to have another psycho-educational assessment done. #1's teacher told me he knows how I only want the best for #1, and that he recommends I phone the principal to discuss this situation. I left voicemail but will try again tomorrow morning. I am very upset and stressed out over this. I wish I knew this info before the IRPC meeting. I would not have let them put him in this same situation for next year. I want him back at either the previous school or the one the karate teacher's wife teaches at. This is going to be a very difficult next few weeks until I figure out the best place for school for him, and a long fight in making the school district change the IRPC placement.

Monday, May 05, 2008

ZZZZZZZZZ

Ok, today I woke up at 5 am and could not fall back asleep! AGAIN! if it's not #3 waking me up in the middle of the night, then its me waking myself up! Maybe my problem is I turn on the computer and that makes me feel more awake, instead of reading, which makes me feel sleepy.

So today I walked down to the main office of #2 and #3 and soon to be #4's school to turn in my subsidy form for tuition for next year. I hope they give us a break like they did this year. Next year #2 will be in grade 1 and the tuition is 10.900 but no one pays that amount, the UJA gives most families a break according to salary and how many kids you have. I am worried because hubby had a slight pay raise but the cost of living has gone up in Canada too, so it really doesn't count. I will be worried about it until I get a letter stating how much subsidy we are getting.

In other news, #1 gave me quite a scare. There have been some break ins in my area unfortunately. I went downstairs to do laundry and noticed my basement window open! I freaked out but didn't' see anything stolen. I called hubby and he said maybe one of the kids did it. But I am thinking, how?? It's high up! It turned out #1 did it by standing on my trunk from university. I told him to never do that again. not only could he have fallen off and hurt himself, anyone could have climbed into our basement through the window!

and one unrelated rant...I am so annoyed at the director of my housing community! She is very fickle about putting in work orders. My air conditioning is broken! it was put in last year, after a year of arguing that something was wrong with my old unit, it blew hot air! So now the new one we have is doing the same damn thing! the maintenance person looked at it and said it needed repair but the director doesn't want to pay for 2 service calls. so now I am gong to have to beg the guy who is coming to do regular maintenance on it to put it in his work report that my unit is not acting normally. Last year this same thing happened and the guy was in such a rush to get his job done to go home (I was one of the last houses of the day) he did not put anything down. I was very pissed. It took until July to be fixed. If its not fixed by end of may I will have to write a letter to the board so they can vote and get my unit fixed. I wish hubby and I could buy our own house..maybe one day I will win the lotto. LOL.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

#5 turns two!!!

Happy second birthday #5!! :) my baby is two today...no longer my lil baby now but my lil toddler...*sniff*. We gave her a cute lil baby Tad from leap frog that plays songs and helps with color and shape recognition.

Next birthday is #2 who will be turning 6 May 29th.

Anyway., I am so tired, had another night of broken sleep. I think I am more tired now than when I had a newborn to take care of!

I will post more tomorrow IY"H.

Thursday, May 01, 2008

I Left My Head in San Francisco

If anyone finds it, please mail it back to me :P. I am so ditzy today. I don't know what is with me LOL. I go to pick up my dry cleaning, and I am in a rush to be back before 10 am as the xbox hubby won is finally going to be couriered over today. I WOULD have been back by that time if I had not dropped my dry cleaning in a pile on the ground, and before that, going back to make sure I signed my check I wrote to them. Someone had picked up my dropped dry cleaning and put it in a Sobeys shopping cart at the other end of the plaza! Meanwhile I am frantic, thinking someone has stolen my daughter's Ralph Lauren down winter jacket (that I got as a real bargain on Ebay BNWT a few years ago and has been passed down from #2). Just then, a sobey's cashier was on her way to the cleaners so I managed to get it back, B"H. But unfortunately, I missed Purolator!! ARG. Now I will have to go the trouble of having to have it redelivered tomorrow. Why the heck am I so forgetful today! I am only 30! It's too early for this absentmindedness LOL.

In other news, we are definitely NOT going to the in laws for Shavuos. I really feel we need a break from the in laws, since having to spend an entire week of Pesach eating almost every meal with them, I think we are getting on each other's nerves. Hubby says I am just being overly sensitive, but I tried to explain to him that a daughter in law's relationship with her mother in law is very complicated. For example, if one's own mother were to say something in a snarky tone of voice, or just be really irritable with you one day, it would be different, but if one's mother in law gets irritable or whatever, it seems its more personal and annoying. I definitely did not enjoy Pesach at all, especially the last 2 days, despite the stomach flu hitting every person in my family. Like I said in an earlier post TOO MUCH is not GOOD!!!

BTW has anyone here watched Dr. Who? Hubby has gotten me hooked on that show. Don't you think the new doctor who, David Tennant, is a cutie? :P

Ok, stuff to do, and I am still so exhausted.

and BTW my title of my blog today is a take off of a tony bennett song I left my heart in san francisco, in case none of you have figured out my weird sense of humor :P